50 Under 50: The List That Got Quieter, But Deeper

I started this blog with the idea that I’d chase 50 things before I turned 50 - an ambitious little bucket list to mark the milestone with flair. At first, I thought it would be full of big moments and Instagram-worthy accomplishments. But the deeper I got into it, the quieter the list became.

Because somewhere between item #7 and my third abandoned draft, I realized something:

I wasn’t struggling to come up with 50 things because I lacked motivation. I was struggling because my life… had gotten simpler.

Not boring. Not small. Simpler.

I’ve spent the last few years unlearning the noise - the pressure to always be doing more, collecting more, proving more. And now, my list isn’t about doing everything before 50. It’s about doing the right things. The ones that still whisper to me. The ones that carry meaning, memory, or healing.

Like getting a bumblebee tattoo - a nod to resilience and the way I’ve learned to keep going, even when the world said I shouldn’t be able to fly.

And a lotus tattoo too, because I’ve grown from some pretty muddy places.

Cutting my hair short - a small thing, maybe, but it feels like shedding the weight of a few old versions of myself. And if you know me, you know that cutting my hair is no small thing. So, on the list it goes.

Running a 5K - not for the time or the medal, but because I want to prove to my body and mind that we can still finish what we start.

A trip to South Carolina. I miss my girls. They’ve come to visit me a few times, and I keep saying, Yes, I’m coming.

I want to go.

I need to go.

So I’m going.

A cruise - not for the luxury, but for laughter, sunshine, and freedom. I've been several times before and it's my favorite vacation. I need the air on my face again.

A new camera - because I still see the world through lenses. And this time, I want to capture it with fresh eyes.

And hitting my goal weight - not because of the number, but because I’ve fought too hard for my health not to celebrate it.

So maybe “50 Under 50” won’t be fifty things.

Maybe it’ll be eight really important ones.

And maybe that’s the lesson:

A meaningful life doesn’t always take up space.

It just has to take root.